don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
