u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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