When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
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