You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
