weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Sober January is a disaster.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
