I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
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