waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
