Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize