im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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