I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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