After last night, I could never be a politician.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
