Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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