no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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