U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
