I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize