If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
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Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
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That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize