Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
