Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize