Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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