Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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