I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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