I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
