fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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