i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Less talking, more tequila
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
false alarm, still single
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
