i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
