we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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