His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
you inspire me to be a worse person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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