Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
