the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
