I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Randomize