the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I wish you could order shots online.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize