Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
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