im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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