so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
