Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
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