listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
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