Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
