it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I DEMAND FORESKIN
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize