omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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