So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
