So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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