Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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