I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
