hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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