pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
