I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many bounce houses so little time
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
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