from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
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