i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
