all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
