Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
